Top Ten Reasons
Curtis Stepped Down As Chair
Number 10
Ran Off to Star in a B-Grade Movie on the American Revolution.
Will Play George III.
Number 9
Was Injured by the Ricochet of a High-Speed,
Airborn Eraser Bound for Student.
Number 8
Decided He Likes the Twentieth-Century.
Wants to Become a Bureaucrat and Social Engineer the Perfect Society.
Number 7
Needs More Time for "Research."
The Commute to Wrigley Field Time-Consuming.
Number 6
Wants To Open Up a Microbrewery Together with President Nichols.
Will Be Called "The Rusty Cub Brewery."
Number 5
Mr. B., The Answer is Right In Front of You
Please Turn to Page 304 in Your Documents Book.
Number 4
Woke Up One Morning and Said, "Curtis You Dope.
Get On a Harley
and See the Country, Just Like on Easy Rider."
Number 3
Learned How To Do Email Last Year.
Now WantsTo Become the Computer Nerd of the Department.
Number 2
Decided to Run For U.S. President.
Will Run on the Whig Party ticket.
Number 1
It's Flat-Damned Obvious.
A Boat, Some Beer, and the Bahamas.
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